Last week I experienced an amazing moment in one class of fourth graders I am working with. We are at the point in our program where we are using stories and activities to highlight how we can make a difference by working together as a community. I retold a story that had a king and his four daughters. Each daughter had different gifts or talents. The first daughter was an artist and sought beauty through drawing and painting. The second daughter was a caregiver and had compassion for anything hurt or injured. The third daughter was spunky, always questioned the rules, and never did what she was told, and the fourth daughter was a thoughtful problem solver who ends up becoming the queen in the story.
It was my hope in this session to begin to let the students work together as a group. So for the first time, the students were going to tell the story themselves and take on the roles of the storyteller, the king and his four daughters. The students were giddy and excited and hands shot up to be the storyteller and the king. Then four students put their hands up to be the four daughters, but when it came down to the students deciding who would be which daughter there arose a problem. The first and fourth daughter roles were filled, but two students wanted to be the third daughter leaving no one to be the second daughter.
Seeing that we were at a standstill in the situation, I realized I could either choose to assign one of the two students to be the second daughter or… let them decide. I chose the latter and asked again, “Who will be the second daughter?” It was a long awkward moment, and you could have heard a pin drop in the room as the entire class seemed suspended in the question. Finally, the silence was broken as a girl – one of the two students who desired the third daughter role – said, “I will be the second daughter.” As she spoke those words she moved over to take the spot where the second daughter would stand. The class was happy and I was proud. I took a moment to recognize her gesture to give up her preferred role in order to move the activity forward for the whole group.
In a way, without her really thinking about it, she had done just what the second daughter would have done. With her choice to give up her preferred role, she saw to the compassionate wellbeing of others. It became a moment of growth for the whole class, but in that moment for me, the ending to that story changed. It was the second daughter who became the queen!